So I have been doing a lot of thinking lately.
I keep hearing myself say, “I don’t have the time.”
And you know what, that makes me nuts.
Because a lot of what I keep saying I don’t have time for are those very things I want to be doing.
I read a quote somewhere (probably over here)
“If it really matters to you, you will make time”
or something to that effect (or is affect? I never know..)
Anyway, it struck me..
kid smiles with everything she’s got, mouth, cheeks, eyes and even her nose.
Last weekend I had a bit of physical purging.. let’s just say I enjoyed celebrating my in-law’s 40th (YES, 40th woot!) wedding anniversary with the rest of the family a little too much- but after walking around like a zombie all day, recovering from one of the worst hang-overs I have had in more than 4 years,
I realized that maybe I needed that ‘purge’ in a way.
Trust me when I say (and please don’t judge me over the fact that I drink, drank, drunk- I have been beating myself up plenty over this),
I could have done without the ick all day, and the fact that I couldn’t eat until about 4pm,
but stick with me here….
I have been feeling really stuck and the light bulb came on over my (very) hung over head-
the words of my yoga teacher came to mind –
release what isn’t serving you any longer, breathe in what is.
She doesn’t fly and I cried as she walked into the station, rolling her little red bags behind her.
To start, I decided to evaluate where my time goes during the day and start to clear some space.
Looking around the house, I realized I have a ton of crap overflowing from my closet, dresser drawers, desk, kitchen cupboards etc, etc, etc.. and all over the place.
I need to sort through all that stuff,
keep what I really love, what fits with where I am (physically and mentally)
and get rid of the rest.
she thinks it’s hysterical to grab the cords to the PlayStation controllers as he plays Fifa Soccer. such a funny little moment I caught here.
Second, take a look at where I put energy that really isn’t necessary.
I have decided to quite facebook. GASP!
It is sort of funny to read the reactions, some super supportive, others totally blown away that I could do this or would want to.
But really, I am sick of finding out things about friends or family that I should be hearing first hand,
either in person or even over the phone- not reading it on facebook.
So if you follow me out there, my account closes on Friday-
drop me an email, give me call, stop by the house-
I need the real connection with my peeps.
This fuels me and keeps me going. It’s been fun out there,
but also what really I need, is one less place to ‘stop’ by while out online.
I am teaching again. once a week for 45 minutes at work. It’s a quick lunch time practice through the wellness program. A perfect ease back into it all I think.
Third, I am toying with the idea of only updating my flickr account once a week, maybe twice.
And perhaps thinning out my contacts- same thing with my blog roll.
Today I was out on google reader and went from almost 500 entries to 3 with a click of a button-
holy S people, that was LIBERATING.
I am still following a ton of blogs, but I needed to clear that reading list out for me to not feel like I was trapped or missing out on something if I didn’t read it right away.
I was also inspired by this post and the little computer program she talked about that actually shuts you out of the Internet for a give amount of time.
I thought, why do I need the computer to do that?
Why don’t I just do that for myself….
He was WILD the other night, so we all went out for a quick walk around the hood to burn off some energy. It was the best idea Daddy had all day!
Yes, I think this is what I need. I will keep you posted on my progress. I know it won’t all happen over night. That I will probably fall back into old habits and ways and then snap back to this idea of cutting back. My blog roll will be stacked back up with unread blog posts.
I am sort of hooked on pinterest right now too, so I am going to have to figure that one out- BUT, but, but, I feel really good about this whole idea.
I want to make time for my sewing, for my cooking, for my kids and my husband.
For my friends and the rest of my family. Real, face to face time- not I think this is what (s)he meant when they posted this or that…
I want to keep taking pictures and documenting my life- that is really why I continue to keep this space, without it my kids wouldn’t have a baby book.
So I will have to come back to evaluate what is and isn’t working with all of this.
Tuning, adjusting and re-evaluating… but isn’t that what life is all about?
Let’s see where this takes me, shall we?